Selfcare Emergency Meter: Preparatory Measures and Pick-Me-Up
Time Commitment: 5-10 minutes
I have loved to stretch ever since warm-up and cool-down stretching for cheerleading in high school. It helps me to reconnect to my body. How many of us live our lives straight from our brain? Some days I just power-through as a floating head, which no attention to my body except when I dress in the morning. Our bodies are amazing mechanisms with intelligence built-in all over! We cannot give our brains all the credit, in turn, forgetting about our bodies.
I am trying to get back into stretching. It's free, easy to do (it's not necessary to turn yourself into a pretzel), and the option is always with you because it's impossible to forget your body at home.
Procedure:
Sometimes I lack creativity. Thank goodness for YouTube :) I searched "guided stretching." Feel free to search and try many. Let me know what your favorite is!
I have attached the following video because it is thorough, yet short. My goal is to memorize the stretches, and complete the routine in the morning with fun music to wake myself up and help prepare for the day.
Why this is wonderful: Stretching reminds me that I'm a whole person, all by myself. Many times my days are spent meeting other peoples' needs (that is basically the definition of the mental health profession!). That is okay because it's what I love, but I am responsible for giving back to myself (as we all are!). Stretching brings my intention and consciousness back to my own body, giving appreciation to this wonderful mechanism that enables me to do the work I love. <3
Friday, September 20, 2013
Sunday, March 10, 2013
Note to future self
Selfcare Emergency Meter: Preparatory Measures
Time Commitment: 15-30 minutes
Life transitions are hard. That seems to be the main theme popping up in my life lately. Endings and beginnings... I will complete my master's degree in two months, bringing my formal student career to an end. Twenty of my (nearly) 25 years of life have been spent as a student. This transition is a big deal. It's filled with excitement and sadness, and everything in between. Creation of a note to my future self is something I have done to respect these conflicting emotions and help integrate the experience for myself.
Procedure: For my "note," I actually created a card. Who doesn't like to receive hand-made cards?? I used watercolor paper because I did not have cardstock on hand, and I created a pleasing collage on the front. I already had pictures that I pre-cut from a variety of magazines, and I chose a combination of pictures that seemed to represent my step into the unknown when I graduate.
*Keep in mind, this note is for you to open in the future. More on this later.
On the inside of the card, I thought about what I will have accomplished once I graduate (think about goals you plan to achieve, where you hope to be in your life when you open your card in the future). I inscribed a note with the underlying meaning of: "you've made it, now you're on to other things that will be great" and "the past has been important, but now you will have the opportunity to reach a higher potential." The note should be encouraging, supportive, and honest. Really. Don't try to B.S. yourself. :) I also tried to avoid concrete predictions like, "I know you have the best job ever now," because that may set you up for disappointment. However, including your hopes (such as: "I hope you have a job you enjoy now") might be helpful because obviously hopes are not guaranteed, but your future self might find the information interesting. On a whole, the importance of this message is that you're rooting for your self in the pursuit of your goals--and that, in itself, is incredibly powerful.
Last, but not least, put your note in an envelope and seal it. For mine, I wrote on the outside of the envelope "Open at the end of May." Put a future date on your envelope that is appropriate for you, but I would recommend doing at least 2 months and at most 6 months. Don't lose your note, and don't open it early! Attach it to your wall calendar under the month you will be opening it, and you won't forget.
Why this is wonderful: The act of making the note ends up being a pretty good self-esteem boost, or at least an interesting way to give yourself perspective. It can help to get out of the rut of over-thinking the future by directly confronting what is worrying you. This can put you at ease in the present moment. Aaand, as a BONUS you get to open it down the road, after you've forgotten what you wrote, and feel like a very special person.
Time Commitment: 15-30 minutes
 | ||
| Unfolding and unfolding and unfolding, with colored pencils, March 2013 |
Procedure: For my "note," I actually created a card. Who doesn't like to receive hand-made cards?? I used watercolor paper because I did not have cardstock on hand, and I created a pleasing collage on the front. I already had pictures that I pre-cut from a variety of magazines, and I chose a combination of pictures that seemed to represent my step into the unknown when I graduate.
*Keep in mind, this note is for you to open in the future. More on this later.
On the inside of the card, I thought about what I will have accomplished once I graduate (think about goals you plan to achieve, where you hope to be in your life when you open your card in the future). I inscribed a note with the underlying meaning of: "you've made it, now you're on to other things that will be great" and "the past has been important, but now you will have the opportunity to reach a higher potential." The note should be encouraging, supportive, and honest. Really. Don't try to B.S. yourself. :) I also tried to avoid concrete predictions like, "I know you have the best job ever now," because that may set you up for disappointment. However, including your hopes (such as: "I hope you have a job you enjoy now") might be helpful because obviously hopes are not guaranteed, but your future self might find the information interesting. On a whole, the importance of this message is that you're rooting for your self in the pursuit of your goals--and that, in itself, is incredibly powerful.
Last, but not least, put your note in an envelope and seal it. For mine, I wrote on the outside of the envelope "Open at the end of May." Put a future date on your envelope that is appropriate for you, but I would recommend doing at least 2 months and at most 6 months. Don't lose your note, and don't open it early! Attach it to your wall calendar under the month you will be opening it, and you won't forget.
Why this is wonderful: The act of making the note ends up being a pretty good self-esteem boost, or at least an interesting way to give yourself perspective. It can help to get out of the rut of over-thinking the future by directly confronting what is worrying you. This can put you at ease in the present moment. Aaand, as a BONUS you get to open it down the road, after you've forgotten what you wrote, and feel like a very special person.
Sunday, August 19, 2012
Write a Letter
Selfcare Emergency Meter: Pick Me Up!!
Time Commitment: 1 hour
Ok! So, I'm taking advice that I've gotten from my Mom a million times, and I'm sharing it with YOU (because it works...sigh)! Today, I am working with Worry. To me, Worry is about control. Worry is trying to control a situation with our minds without actually doing anything about it. Some situations don't directly involve us and we cannot make choices for other people, so we Worry, thinking thats all we can do. Here is something we can do to resolve that Worry.
Procedure: We are going to write a letter to the person/people we are worried about. This is not about putting pressure on yourself to write something incredibly inspiring. This process is about being honest with, and taking care of yourself.
*There is no requirement saying you even have to send this very personal letter*
Feel free to do a "brainstorm" first. Write phrases, thoughts, ideas, and feelings down as they relate to your Worry. Use these to guide your letter. Beware of tangents by coming back to your feelings in regards to the matter. Your own feelings, no one else's. Be honest. Note how you are feeling in your body, as well as emotion-wise. (My hands were trembling as I wrote my letter...)
If you are planning on sending your letter, read and re-read the finished product-- how would YOU feel if someone wrote this letter to you? If your answer is in the ballpark of "judged" or "offended," you may not want to send it. This is perfectly fine as well, because venting in a letter and not sending it is just as helpful!!!
(and, yes, that is a picture of a "Howler" message from Harry Potter)
When finished writing, let your Worry release. It is all written down for you to come back to if you choose. Let that Worry live on the paper; it has a new home, and doesn't need to reside in your body and brain anymore.
Why this is wonderful: This is a good way to externalize your feelings in word-form. Externalizing is getting it out! The process helps to dislodge this Worry and keep it from affecting you in an unhealthy way. Obviously, it will still affect you in some ways because you CARE :) but it is not your burden to carry.
Also, if you decide to send your letter, the authenticity and vulnerability you displayed within may just open new, deeper avenues of communication with the person/people you send it to.
PS. Mine goes out with the mail tomorrow. Fingers crossed. <3
Time Commitment: 1 hour
Ok! So, I'm taking advice that I've gotten from my Mom a million times, and I'm sharing it with YOU (because it works...sigh)! Today, I am working with Worry. To me, Worry is about control. Worry is trying to control a situation with our minds without actually doing anything about it. Some situations don't directly involve us and we cannot make choices for other people, so we Worry, thinking thats all we can do. Here is something we can do to resolve that Worry.Procedure: We are going to write a letter to the person/people we are worried about. This is not about putting pressure on yourself to write something incredibly inspiring. This process is about being honest with, and taking care of yourself.
*There is no requirement saying you even have to send this very personal letter*
Feel free to do a "brainstorm" first. Write phrases, thoughts, ideas, and feelings down as they relate to your Worry. Use these to guide your letter. Beware of tangents by coming back to your feelings in regards to the matter. Your own feelings, no one else's. Be honest. Note how you are feeling in your body, as well as emotion-wise. (My hands were trembling as I wrote my letter...)
If you are planning on sending your letter, read and re-read the finished product-- how would YOU feel if someone wrote this letter to you? If your answer is in the ballpark of "judged" or "offended," you may not want to send it. This is perfectly fine as well, because venting in a letter and not sending it is just as helpful!!!(and, yes, that is a picture of a "Howler" message from Harry Potter)
When finished writing, let your Worry release. It is all written down for you to come back to if you choose. Let that Worry live on the paper; it has a new home, and doesn't need to reside in your body and brain anymore.
Why this is wonderful: This is a good way to externalize your feelings in word-form. Externalizing is getting it out! The process helps to dislodge this Worry and keep it from affecting you in an unhealthy way. Obviously, it will still affect you in some ways because you CARE :) but it is not your burden to carry.
Also, if you decide to send your letter, the authenticity and vulnerability you displayed within may just open new, deeper avenues of communication with the person/people you send it to.
PS. Mine goes out with the mail tomorrow. Fingers crossed. <3
Friday, June 15, 2012
Postcard Project, Pt. 1
Selfcare Emergency Meter: Pick Me Up
Time Commitment: 5 min, here and there till finish
This project was originally created by my friend/classmate, Kathi. It involves reaching out to people who have been special to you at different times in your past--through life's highs and lows. Ultimately, she sent these special people a letter acknowledging their influence on her life, as well as a prompt for them to decorate a self-addressed and stamped blank postcard (included in the envelope with the letter) to be sent back to her. Kathi's version involved exploring and expanding what "family" means.
Her process throughout this project was so inspiring that I wanted to try it myself! My own version explores "friendship" in a similar way.
Procedure: I set up a very organized, step-by-step procedure for myself, which I completed with 5 minutes here and 5 minutes there, so I did not get overwhelmed!
1. Gather/buy materials: stamps, blank postcards, envelopes ("invitation" size worked nicely for me)
2. Compile list of friends you would like to include. This could be a short list or a long list, depending on how much work you can put into the project. I picked 12 particularly special people.
3. Gather addresses for your list. Private Facebook messages worked well for this step.
4. Type a (single) letter that will go to every person on your list. Include: explanation of project, why you chose these people, prompt for postcard decorating, and what you will use their responses for.
First, I chose not to make individual letters for each person because I thought it might skew their responses. I wanted to see how each person would react uniquely to the exact same letter. I did, however, explain this detail in my writing, just to acknowledge this seemingly impersonal aspect. Second, my prompt was: "What does friendship mean to you?" I made sure to explain that whatever "answer" the person came up with was perfect and correct. I encouraged creativity, noting the "answer" could involve words, shapes, colors, etc. Last, I let my friends know that I will be writing blog posts about this project and they should let me know if they would not like their postcard to be featured.
5. Self-address and stamp enough blank postcards for your list
6. Stamp envelopes and write friend's addresses. During this step, I encourage you to think about each person. What memories come to mind? Happy ones? Sad? You may not have talked to this person in awhile. Notice the vulnerability that comes up around reaching out to others. Especially other people that are important to you. Reaching out is hard to do sometimes, but the possibility of the person reaching back can be incredibly rewarding.
7. Place a letter and postcard into each envelope, and mail them off with a sense of hope and pride :)
Why this is wonderful: It attends to your brain! The process of this project stirs up old feelings and memories, and hopefully a few smiles. For me, it was helpful to realize how many people I really do want to keep in touch with--how many special people I have met in my life. Although I did not include every single person who has touched my life, this process definitely reminded me to be thankful for what I have and what I have had in the past. It is also another lesson in patience; we do all this work to get the letters in the mail, then....we wait. (But, that's a story for Pt.2)
Time Commitment: 5 min, here and there till finish
This project was originally created by my friend/classmate, Kathi. It involves reaching out to people who have been special to you at different times in your past--through life's highs and lows. Ultimately, she sent these special people a letter acknowledging their influence on her life, as well as a prompt for them to decorate a self-addressed and stamped blank postcard (included in the envelope with the letter) to be sent back to her. Kathi's version involved exploring and expanding what "family" means. Her process throughout this project was so inspiring that I wanted to try it myself! My own version explores "friendship" in a similar way.
Procedure: I set up a very organized, step-by-step procedure for myself, which I completed with 5 minutes here and 5 minutes there, so I did not get overwhelmed!
1. Gather/buy materials: stamps, blank postcards, envelopes ("invitation" size worked nicely for me)
2. Compile list of friends you would like to include. This could be a short list or a long list, depending on how much work you can put into the project. I picked 12 particularly special people.
3. Gather addresses for your list. Private Facebook messages worked well for this step.
4. Type a (single) letter that will go to every person on your list. Include: explanation of project, why you chose these people, prompt for postcard decorating, and what you will use their responses for.
First, I chose not to make individual letters for each person because I thought it might skew their responses. I wanted to see how each person would react uniquely to the exact same letter. I did, however, explain this detail in my writing, just to acknowledge this seemingly impersonal aspect. Second, my prompt was: "What does friendship mean to you?" I made sure to explain that whatever "answer" the person came up with was perfect and correct. I encouraged creativity, noting the "answer" could involve words, shapes, colors, etc. Last, I let my friends know that I will be writing blog posts about this project and they should let me know if they would not like their postcard to be featured.5. Self-address and stamp enough blank postcards for your list
6. Stamp envelopes and write friend's addresses. During this step, I encourage you to think about each person. What memories come to mind? Happy ones? Sad? You may not have talked to this person in awhile. Notice the vulnerability that comes up around reaching out to others. Especially other people that are important to you. Reaching out is hard to do sometimes, but the possibility of the person reaching back can be incredibly rewarding.
7. Place a letter and postcard into each envelope, and mail them off with a sense of hope and pride :)
Why this is wonderful: It attends to your brain! The process of this project stirs up old feelings and memories, and hopefully a few smiles. For me, it was helpful to realize how many people I really do want to keep in touch with--how many special people I have met in my life. Although I did not include every single person who has touched my life, this process definitely reminded me to be thankful for what I have and what I have had in the past. It is also another lesson in patience; we do all this work to get the letters in the mail, then....we wait. (But, that's a story for Pt.2)
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Date night- with yourself!
Selfcare Emergency Meter: Pick Me Up/Overhaul
Time Commitment: a few hours to 1 evening
I was planning to write a magnificent post about finding empowerment in taking yourself out to do things--being your own date. I find it refreshing to be able to take myself to lunch, only bringing a book along if needed. Or, I like to carry a sketchbook to a coffee shop and be in my world, not worrying about everyone else. Or, many other things that get me out of the house.
I said I was planning because I am not going to go into detail about this, instead I recommend that you watch the following clip from youtube (about 5 min long). My roommate, Hannah Brann, showed this clip to me and it's truly magical. It says everything I wanted to write, so please, enjoy (and share)!
Time Commitment: a few hours to 1 evening
I was planning to write a magnificent post about finding empowerment in taking yourself out to do things--being your own date. I find it refreshing to be able to take myself to lunch, only bringing a book along if needed. Or, I like to carry a sketchbook to a coffee shop and be in my world, not worrying about everyone else. Or, many other things that get me out of the house.
I said I was planning because I am not going to go into detail about this, instead I recommend that you watch the following clip from youtube (about 5 min long). My roommate, Hannah Brann, showed this clip to me and it's truly magical. It says everything I wanted to write, so please, enjoy (and share)!
Why this is wonderful: This encourages you to cultivate the relationship you have with yourself. It allows you to sit with possible uncomfortable, awkward feelings, and realize those feelings are okay and entirely human. The video holds such a gentleness around the importance of being alone sometimes. It certainly doesn't negate the importance of relationships. In my own experience, I believe that working on my ability to be with myself helps me to be more authentic in relationship. <3
Friday, June 1, 2012
Second Morning
Selfcare Emergency Meter: Overhaul
Time Commitment: 1 hour
Do you ever have particularly stressful mornings that set your entire day up for disaster? I do! It's super distressing because morning is my favorite part of the day! By no means is this selfcare tool only for morning people though--just ask my roomie! "Second Morning" is about giving yourself a second chance to have a good day.
Procedure: When work, a relationship, or life in general is stressing you out or taking every ounce of your energy all before noon, the rest of your day could look rather bleak. When you notice this negative inner prediction arise--hold it!! Recognize and acknowledge that this is a moment of choice! Choose to have a Second Morning; a re-do, if I may. Notice the stressors from your conventional first morning and let them go. They already happened, so they don't need to affect your current mood in this new moment in time. The stressors may take further deliberation, yes, but do not hold on to those spinning negative thoughts and feelings. You have a choice! Restart the coffee pot (I usually switch to decaf at this point...). Inhale that comforting aroma. Take a little walk with your coffee: around the office, down the street, around your house. Feel your footsteps on the ground. Reconnect with your body. Continue your day.
Believe in your Second Morning. Have faith in this fresh start and it may surprise you with how well it works!
Why this is wonderful: First, it uses multiple senses. Engaging these senses allows you to reconnect with your body and bring your energy back inside, instead of spilling it all around you. Second, this highlights an element of choice that we have in our lives. You are not doomed to have a "bad day." Rejoice! :)
Time Commitment: 1 hour
Do you ever have particularly stressful mornings that set your entire day up for disaster? I do! It's super distressing because morning is my favorite part of the day! By no means is this selfcare tool only for morning people though--just ask my roomie! "Second Morning" is about giving yourself a second chance to have a good day.
Procedure: When work, a relationship, or life in general is stressing you out or taking every ounce of your energy all before noon, the rest of your day could look rather bleak. When you notice this negative inner prediction arise--hold it!! Recognize and acknowledge that this is a moment of choice! Choose to have a Second Morning; a re-do, if I may. Notice the stressors from your conventional first morning and let them go. They already happened, so they don't need to affect your current mood in this new moment in time. The stressors may take further deliberation, yes, but do not hold on to those spinning negative thoughts and feelings. You have a choice! Restart the coffee pot (I usually switch to decaf at this point...). Inhale that comforting aroma. Take a little walk with your coffee: around the office, down the street, around your house. Feel your footsteps on the ground. Reconnect with your body. Continue your day.Believe in your Second Morning. Have faith in this fresh start and it may surprise you with how well it works!
Why this is wonderful: First, it uses multiple senses. Engaging these senses allows you to reconnect with your body and bring your energy back inside, instead of spilling it all around you. Second, this highlights an element of choice that we have in our lives. You are not doomed to have a "bad day." Rejoice! :)
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Yardwork/Gardening
Selfcare Emergency Meter: Overhaul
Time Commitment: 1 hour increments; ongoing
In the past couple of weeks, I have found working in my yard to be intrinsically rewarding and, quite possibly, relaxing.
A bit of background about my yard:
It is shared by 6 people who live in the house. It has been a site for storage and/or accumulated junk from people that have lived there in the past: car doors, bathtub, tires, etc. Six people are renting the house, but rarely does anyone want to put their time, money, or energy into the yard since we don't own it. I have decided (maybe because I enjoy Better Homes and Gardens waaayy too much) that I want to adopt the yard and make it an enjoyable place to hang out.
Procedure: Get to know the area you're working with first. I sit in the yard a lot and look at it. I enjoy the breeze, the occasional sunshine streaming through the leaves, and the odd, wooden, bobbin-like piece of furniture we use for a table (see picture). I spend time with the yard, building a relationship around my belief in its potential.
Next, begin a 3-phase process with small, measurable (and achievable) steps within each phase that will foster your own success. This part was very helpful for me to organize my thoughts; it's easy for me to get overwhelmed by looking at the big picture too quickly. The three phases are: Break-down, Rebuild, and Polish. Break-down, for me, consists of getting rid of items in the yard, weeding, pruning, and getting the lawn mowed so I can see what I'm working with. Rebuild consists of delineating where flower beds will go and blocking areas off, then repairing the lawn by planting grass seed. Polish is the fun part because it's when I get to plant things in the flower beds and add nice things to lawn (patio chairs, etc.). It's good to remember that that phases do not always go in perfect order and each can be repeated as needed. The phases provided a structure to motivate action, and are definitely not rigid.
Throughout the process, I am striving to be cost-effective, not only because it's smart, but because it's really my only option! :) I am utilizing friends and craigslist. I have borrowed yardwork equipment from friends, and have received plants from friends' gardens. I have been selling the random stuff out of the yard on craigslist. I have also been scouring craigslist's "free" section as well as their "farm and garden" section. Additionally, I answered a lawn-mowing advertisement on craigslist and had the lawn mowed for $20, AND I got valuable advice from him on my next steps with the yard as well as things to be weary of.
Wow, that's a lot of words for today!
Let's get on to why this is wonderful!
Why this is wonderful: It attends mainly to movement and sight.
I feel really good when I'm working in the yard. Raking, weeding...bending, stretching, reaching. The work is great for my body. My muscles feel it afterward and I didn't have to go to the gym. Also, this movement is good for re-discovering that connection between my mind and body. Refreshing. As for sight, the space becomes much more welcoming and comforting when you can see the care put into it. It's incredibly rewarding for me to see the tremendous amount of progress I have made in a short time. Yes, some things take more time (like grass growing...), with delayed sight-gratification, but that is great too! Gardening and yardwork are amazing practice for cultivating patience. And one could never have enough patience....
Time Commitment: 1 hour increments; ongoing
Relaxing- a mysterious phenomenon people may accomplish during that elusive construct known as "free time"
So, one goal I have for this summer is to learn how to "relax." It really is as mind-boggling as the definition I have written above. I have 18 consecutive years of education under my belt as of now. I am good at school. Now, I want to be good at relaxing! I need it!In the past couple of weeks, I have found working in my yard to be intrinsically rewarding and, quite possibly, relaxing.
A bit of background about my yard:
Procedure: Get to know the area you're working with first. I sit in the yard a lot and look at it. I enjoy the breeze, the occasional sunshine streaming through the leaves, and the odd, wooden, bobbin-like piece of furniture we use for a table (see picture). I spend time with the yard, building a relationship around my belief in its potential.Next, begin a 3-phase process with small, measurable (and achievable) steps within each phase that will foster your own success. This part was very helpful for me to organize my thoughts; it's easy for me to get overwhelmed by looking at the big picture too quickly. The three phases are: Break-down, Rebuild, and Polish. Break-down, for me, consists of getting rid of items in the yard, weeding, pruning, and getting the lawn mowed so I can see what I'm working with. Rebuild consists of delineating where flower beds will go and blocking areas off, then repairing the lawn by planting grass seed. Polish is the fun part because it's when I get to plant things in the flower beds and add nice things to lawn (patio chairs, etc.). It's good to remember that that phases do not always go in perfect order and each can be repeated as needed. The phases provided a structure to motivate action, and are definitely not rigid.
Throughout the process, I am striving to be cost-effective, not only because it's smart, but because it's really my only option! :) I am utilizing friends and craigslist. I have borrowed yardwork equipment from friends, and have received plants from friends' gardens. I have been selling the random stuff out of the yard on craigslist. I have also been scouring craigslist's "free" section as well as their "farm and garden" section. Additionally, I answered a lawn-mowing advertisement on craigslist and had the lawn mowed for $20, AND I got valuable advice from him on my next steps with the yard as well as things to be weary of.
Wow, that's a lot of words for today!
Let's get on to why this is wonderful!
Why this is wonderful: It attends mainly to movement and sight. I feel really good when I'm working in the yard. Raking, weeding...bending, stretching, reaching. The work is great for my body. My muscles feel it afterward and I didn't have to go to the gym. Also, this movement is good for re-discovering that connection between my mind and body. Refreshing. As for sight, the space becomes much more welcoming and comforting when you can see the care put into it. It's incredibly rewarding for me to see the tremendous amount of progress I have made in a short time. Yes, some things take more time (like grass growing...), with delayed sight-gratification, but that is great too! Gardening and yardwork are amazing practice for cultivating patience. And one could never have enough patience....
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