Postcard Project, Pt. 1

Selfcare Emergency Meter: Pick Me Up
Time Commitment: 5 min, here and there till finish

This project was originally created by my friend/classmate, Kathi.  It involves reaching out to people who have been special to you at different times in your past--through life's highs and lows.  Ultimately, she sent these special people a letter acknowledging their influence on her life, as well as a prompt for them to decorate a self-addressed and stamped blank postcard (included in the envelope with the letter) to be sent back to her.  Kathi's version involved exploring and expanding what "family" means. 

Her process throughout this project was so inspiring that I wanted to try it myself!  My own version explores "friendship" in a similar way.

Procedure:  I set up a very organized, step-by-step procedure for myself, which I completed with 5 minutes here and 5 minutes there, so I did not get overwhelmed!
   1. Gather/buy materials: stamps, blank postcards, envelopes ("invitation" size worked nicely for me)
   2. Compile list of friends you would like to include.  This could be a short list or a long list, depending on how much work you can put into the project.  I picked 12 particularly special people.
   3. Gather addresses for your list.  Private Facebook messages worked well for this step.
   4. Type a (single) letter that will go to every person on your list.  Include: explanation of project, why you chose these people, prompt for postcard decorating, and what you will use their responses for. 
First, I chose not to make individual letters for each person because I thought it might skew their responses.  I wanted to see how each person would react uniquely to the exact same letter.  I did, however, explain this detail in my writing, just to acknowledge this seemingly impersonal aspect.  Second, my prompt was: "What does friendship mean to you?"  I made sure to explain that whatever "answer" the person came up with was perfect and correct.  I encouraged creativity, noting the "answer" could involve words, shapes, colors, etc.  Last, I let my friends know that I will be writing blog posts about this project and they should let me know if they would not like their postcard to be featured.
  5.  Self-address and stamp enough blank postcards for your list
  6.  Stamp envelopes and write friend's addresses.  During this step, I encourage you to think about each person.  What memories come to mind?  Happy ones?  Sad?  You may not have talked to this person in awhile.  Notice the vulnerability that comes up around reaching out to others.  Especially other people that are important to you.  Reaching out is hard to do sometimes, but the possibility of the person reaching back can be incredibly rewarding.
  7.  Place a letter and postcard into each envelope, and mail them off with a sense of hope and pride :)

Why this is wonderful:  It attends to your brain!  The process of this project stirs up old feelings and memories, and hopefully a few smiles.  For me, it was helpful to realize how many people I really do want to keep in touch with--how many special people I have met in my life.  Although I did not include every single person who has touched my life, this process definitely reminded me to be thankful for what I have and what I have had in the past.  It is also another lesson in patience; we do all this work to get the letters in the mail, then....we wait.  (But, that's a story for Pt.2)

Yardwork/Gardening

Selfcare Emergency Meter: Overhaul
Time Commitment: 1 hour increments; ongoing

Relaxing- a mysterious phenomenon people may accomplish during that elusive construct known as "free time"

So, one goal I have for this summer is to learn how to "relax."  It really is as mind-boggling as the definition I have written above.  I have 18 consecutive years of education under my belt as of now.  I am good at school.  Now, I want to be good at relaxing!  I need it!

In the past couple of weeks, I have found working in my yard to be intrinsically rewarding and, quite possibly, relaxing. 

A bit of background about my yard:

It is shared by 6 people who live in the house.  It has been a site for storage and/or accumulated junk from people that have lived there in the past: car doors, bathtub, tires, etc. Six people are renting the house, but rarely does anyone want to put their time, money, or energy into the yard since we don't own it.  I have decided (maybe because I enjoy Better Homes and Gardens waaayy too much) that I want to adopt the yard and make it an enjoyable place to hang out.

Procedure: Get to know the area you're working with first.  I sit in the yard a lot and look at it.  I enjoy the breeze, the occasional sunshine streaming through the leaves, and the odd, wooden, bobbin-like piece of furniture we use for a table (see picture).  I spend time with the yard, building a relationship around my belief in its potential.
Next, begin a 3-phase process with small, measurable (and achievable) steps within each phase that will foster your own success. This part was very helpful for me to organize my thoughts; it's easy for me to get overwhelmed by looking at the big picture too quickly.  The three phases are: Break-down, Rebuild, and Polish. Break-down, for me, consists of getting rid of items in the yard, weeding, pruning, and getting the lawn mowed so I can see what I'm working with.  Rebuild consists of delineating where flower beds will go and blocking areas off, then repairing the lawn by planting grass seed.  Polish is the fun part because it's when I get to plant things in the flower beds and add nice things to lawn (patio chairs, etc.).  It's good to remember that that phases do not always go in perfect order and each can be repeated as needed.  The phases provided a structure to motivate action, and are definitely not rigid.

Throughout the process, I am striving to be cost-effective, not only because it's smart, but because it's really my only option! :)  I am utilizing friends and craigslist.  I have borrowed yardwork equipment from friends, and have received plants from friends' gardens.  I have been selling the random stuff out of the yard on craigslist.  I have also been scouring craigslist's "free" section as well as their "farm and garden" section.  Additionally, I answered a lawn-mowing advertisement on craigslist and had the lawn mowed for $20, AND I got valuable advice from him on my next steps with the yard as well as things to be weary of.

Wow, that's a lot of words for today!
Let's get on to why this is wonderful!

Why this is wonderful: It attends mainly to movement and sight. 
I feel really good when I'm working in the yard.  Raking, weeding...bending, stretching, reaching.  The work is great for my body.  My muscles feel it afterward and I didn't have to go to the gym.  Also, this movement is good for re-discovering that connection between my mind and body.  Refreshing.  As for sight, the space becomes much more welcoming and comforting when you can see the care put into it.  It's incredibly rewarding for me to see the tremendous amount of progress I have made in a short time. Yes, some things take more time (like grass growing...), with delayed sight-gratification, but that is great too!  Gardening and yardwork are amazing practice for cultivating patience. And one could never have enough patience....

Write it down-with art this time!

Selfcare Emergency Meter: Overhaul
Time Commitment: 45 min. (or more if you wish)


Hey there friends!  It's time for me to resurface to write another post.  No, I have not forgotten about you.  You are always on my mind :) With school and life and everything in between, this Selfcare Fairy got a little bogged down!  I admit it. That doesn't mean the selfcare stopped flowing though--don't worry about that!  I am back to let you in on some of my Selfcare Adventures from the past month.
The current post is about a project I actually started in the summer, forgot about, then came back to me recently.    This "Overhaul" option is an altered book that has become my visual diary for the things in my life that I simply don't have enough understanding around in order to write about them in words.

Procedure: Start with an old hardback book, preferably one you are not attached to.  Snag one at a thrift store for under a dollar.  Skim through a few pages of the book (anywhere in the book, not necessarily the beginning) and find a phrase that speaks to your mood in the moment.  Most likely the phrase will be completely out of context for the book, and that's the point, you're making your own story in this book.  You may block out the phrase(s) on the page with acrylic paint or collage materials.  I have been using collage materials a lot lately.  (I may or may not have been conned on the phone into subscribing to 9 magazines...) 

It is important to let your automatic reactions guide you--don't think too much.  Pick the phrase, paint color, collage image that jumps out at you first.  Don't overthink.  If you think you're messing up this page, who cares? There are a million other pages in the book.  That's the beauty of this project.  Do what you want to the page.  When you finish painting/collaging, does the page feel done?  Maybe you need to grab a sharpie and write extra words or draw your own pictures.  Maybe you need to rip the page and sew it back together.  Oh the possibilities!  You are done with the page when it feels done.  This may take more than one session, and that's ok!  This project is meant to accompany you for awhile in your life; it will not be done in one sitting.  After you work on your page(s), sit with it.  Reflect on it.  Are there any relevant metaphors popping out to you ("this image means this to me")?  What does it mean to you in the moment?  It can mean anything you want, it's your project, it's your visual diary.  Look back at it the next day, week, month.  Maybe it will mean something different.  You might learn something new about yourself.


Why this is wonderful: It attends to 1 major sense: sight.  This project serves as a way of externalizing confusing parts inside ourselves so we can look at them and examine them.  Using our automatic reactions to dictate the page, we help unconscious material to surface, eventually fostering a deeper understanding of ourselves. Yeah!